I dreamed a dream...

as some of you may know (or may not know...haha) i have been listening to Les Miserables for the better part of three weeks. i love this play. it isn't happy..but the music in it is so epic and beautiful...i just can't get enough of it. there's a line in the song 'I Dreamed a Dream' where Fantine is talking about how she fell in love one summer years ago and she got pregnant and then he was just gone one morning. for years she still expected him to come back and he never did and then she says 'but there are dreams that cannot be, and there are storms we cannot weather'. oh i just love it. i'm not depressed, haha, no matter how it may seem by this first paragraph. i think she's really just saying somethings aren't meant to be, sometimes there is something that is just too big for us. who knows? maybe thats where i am.

i like writing in this thing again for all 546,089 of you who read it. ;) i do really appreciate you guys keeping up with me tho. i had a calzone for lunch. now i'll have to have a shake for dinner. haha. eh. i did it to myself. maybe if i don't spend all this time cooking and preparing a big dinner, i'll actually get my living room cleaned and organized and maybe even (gasp!) packed. i really really need to start doing that. i am also going to throw my favorite pair of vans in the washing machine to see if i can save them. i haven't had the money to go buy another pair and i'm worried they will stop making them. we shall see. i don't know how smart it is to throw muddy sneakers into a washing machine, but that's what it is there for, right? we'll find out. haha.

i'm spending my memorial day weekend packing my aparment and then working monday. i'm taking friday off to move so i'm working monday to make up the time. too bad i don't get paid time and a half. haha.

i think the shakes are going well. oh i was pissed off on wednesday. i had my brand new thing of shake mix and some pills to help me sleep in a plastic bag under my desk and the effing cleaning crew threw them away. they NEVER throw anything away if it isn't in the trash can. not this time. :( there goes $45 or so down the drain. i called the cleaning crew guy and no word back. kind of disappointing. i love when i come up with something new. this morning i made a shake with chocolate shake mix, a sugar free snack pack (dulce de leche flavored), and a couple teaspoons of peanut butter. yum YUM. it was freaking awesome. i can't wait to make another one of those. i bought a thing of rice pudding snack packs to try them out and i don't like them as much. i'll survive tho. :)

i had the same salmon thing for dinner last night but this time i added some whole grain rice, half a whole wheat english muffin and some curried vegetables. it was really yummy. i discovered in reading up on some health food websites that i may not be eating enough. i'm definitely not getting enough carbs (hence the english muffin and the wild rice).

anyway, i think this may very well be the most boring blog ever. i leave you with a more current picture of me for those of you reading that i never see. :)